Saturday, January 22, 2011

Saturday rambling...

There's no point really to this post except I'm waiting for my coffee to really kick in so I can get moving.

There are some areas I really succeeded this week in getting some organization done and some I'm still struggling. I got all my soap stuff lame is that? I did get Esther's room done and some of the old clothes out of her closet and drawers, yet there's still a basket of clean clothes sitting by her closet for me to put away. I despise laundry...just saying.

Ok so I didn't get all done this week I wanted to but it was a fun week. I had a lot of time with Esther to just play with her (I guess I must have gotten some of my "chores" done to have free time). I'm very grateful when I feel like God's pushed life aside so I can just sit with my daughter and have fun. I also got some soap made and I went and tried on wedding dresses with my oldest friend. So I've had some really nice down time.

There has been some stress this week. I have to speak in public for the first time tomorrow. I'm not a public speaker so I've been very anxious but my husband has been making me practice every night. It's helped me to feel more relaxed and I just keep a prayer of peace in my mind.

As I sit here thinking of a million things I want to type (yes the chaos is in my head too, not just my life) my husbands music is playing in the background, calming me, soothing me. He writes such beautiful music. There are times the beauty of it just brings tears to my eyes. I hope he puts together another album of just his instrumentals. It seems to wash away all the garbage swirling in my head when I hear it.

Then again, my husband tends to bring great peace to me when we're together anyway.

Friday, January 14, 2011

out with the old

Why does it always feel like the new year begins so busy?  I looked at the calendar today and was shocked to realize that it was the 14th. Where in the world did the last two weeks go?  I feel like my life is in chaos right now with no direct path each day. God has been affirming those feelings. He has brought up in three different ways, in the last two weeks, that I need to get my days organized.
One of my selfish goals through this process is that when I do take the time to relax that I can really relax. I don't now, I think about everything I need to get done but I'm not doing. So my rest time has turned into stress time.  I also deeply desire to have more focused time with God, instead of feeling like I'm squeezing Him into my schedule. I know that if I make that time each day my days will go much smoother.
During school this week, the family presentation was on the Chinese traditions for their new year. I really connected with their tradition on throwing out all their junk the day before their new year. They do this to cleanse their lives for the upcoming year. Obviously I don't follow those traditions but that one struck a cord with me. I've been thinking all week about the areas of our lives and in our home where we can cleanse all the garbage out.
Wednesday was my bedroom. Today it's on to Esther's. Then on to other rooms. I'm taking the house one room at a time and simplifying our lives and clutter both physically and spiritually.

Lord, I ask that you help and direct me in my sorting and cleansing. Please give me wisdom as to what "things" both physically and spiritually I need to cleanse from my life.
 "But who can endure the day of His coming? And who can stand when He appears? For He is like a refiner's fire and like fullers' soap." ~ malachi 3:2